Full disclosure, I’m a pretty average looking guy. Maybe even a little on the short side.
Most of society is baffled when they see average dudes with hot girls.
And most average guys that AREN’T with hot girls, probably think that those girls aren’t for them.
They see hot girls and think…”She’s out of my league”.
“She probably only dates hot guys”.
If this is how you think, cut that shit out because you’re in luck: You’re a man. You can do something about it.
In fact, theres actually quite a lot you can do if you want to get the girls that you “don’t deserve”.
Let me explain:
Wanna know the difference between a good looking guy and an average looking guy when approaching hot women?
The answer is 30 seconds.
If you’re good looking but have no game, you maybe get 30 extra seconds of the girl tolerating your low-value approach before she gets turned off.
I’ve seen this happen too many times to count.
So do good looks for men help you in terms of conversation? Maybe a smidge in the beginning. But if you screw up those first 30 seconds, you’re toast.
Looks vs. Value
No matter how many times I say that looks don’t matter all that much, I never fail to get a flood of guys whining about their appearance.
“But Todd, I’m 5ft 7!”
“But Todd, I’m bald!”
“But Todd, I’m too old!”
But let me ask you this:
Are your looks going to help you hunt down antelope in the savannas of Africa?
Are your looks going to kill the grizzly bear when it comes to eat you, your wife and your children in the middle of the night?
Will your looks help you pay the bills on time and put food on the table?
No.
In the grand scheme of survival, looks matter zero percent.
And survival and replication are the major motivators of female attraction according to evolution.
So what a woman really wants and needs is for you to be a man of value – someone that can help her and her offspring survive and thrive – and that’s not dependant on your looks.
So without further ado, I’m going to give you my guide on how totally average looking guys can get HOT girls.
THE TRUTH ABOUT HOT GIRLS AND AVERAGE LOOKING GUYS
Here’s the thing, a lot of guys get caught up on their looks, and it’s not really their fault.
For our entire lives, we’ve been told that looks are the be all and end all – by our parents, by commercials, by our peer group, by Hollywood.
And to an extent, they’re right. Looks are a little bit important. But they’re not nearly as important for guys as most think.
See as guys, we are very visual with what we perceive as attractive.
We see a hot girl and straight away think “I want her!”
On the other hand, we see a girl who’s not so physically attractive, and even if she has a great personality, we’ll think “Not interested. I might maybe like to be friends with her, or maybe not…”
So it’s undeniable that our sexual attraction for women is visual – we look for attributes like youth, health, and vitality. The reason for that is purely biological.
As I’ve spoken about on other blog posts, we evolved from a very brutal and unforgiving environment.
Around 10,000 – 10,000,000 years ago there wasn’t a lot of good easy-to-get nutrition available, and child mortality rates were through the roof. Therefore, it was very important that if you got a girl pregnant, that she’d be young and healthy so that the child had the best chance of survival.
That’s why men almost always prefer younger women.
However, the same does NOT apply when women are judging the attractiveness of a man.
When a woman is looking for the best partner for her to ensure that her offspring will be able to survive, physical appearance matters very little.
What matters a lot more are resources, social standing, and general health.
Notice something? Those attributes and characteristics are not something dependent on looks or age.
In fact, resources and social standing generally go up with age! (If you’re living life right, that is).
That’s why looks or age don’t matter as much for men because what we’re being evaluated on is our social status and our ability to provide resources.
Girls are much more conscious of how people respond to you socially, what resources you can provide to her future children, and what lifestyle you can bring her into.
Now to be clear, the point I’m making to you is not the common mantra of ‘looks don’t matter’. That’s too much of a sweeping generalization.
The point I’m making is that looks don’t matter nearly as much as mainstream society would have you believe.
So if you aren’t a good looking guy and you’re going out to pick up girls, be glad that you’re a guy!
Thankfully, women aren’t as shallow as us when it comes to physical appearance, and you’re in a much better position than if you were an unattractive girl trying to meet a high-status man.
HOW TO TALK TO HOT GIRLS IF YOU’RE AN AVERAGE LOOKING GUY
If you’re an average looking guy and you want the best chance at talking to the hottest girls, then here’s your best bet: be high value.
What does that even mean though?
Well, show social cues of confidence. Be relaxed. Convey yourself with a dominant ease. Use your words in an attractive manner. Be a leader. Show interest, but also show disinterest.
This is essentially game. Have good game. If you’re new to this and need to learn what good game is, either learn from my Youtube channels or check out my course, The System.
Other things you can do to show high value:
Ideally, have friends around you that reflect well of you.
Indicate that you know what you’re doing with girls, so it shows that you’ve been with other women before – a passive form of pre-selection.
Learn how to flirt from a high value frame.
All of these cues are going to matter to the girl way more than appearance.
THE CHEAT CODE FOR AVERAGE LOOKING GUYS
There’s not a ton you can do about your looks right?
Wrong.
Fact is, you can change almost 95% of the things that compromise your appearance.
Look, appearance does matter. Especially in areas like social media and online dating, where you’re judged first hand on the visual cues of your appearance.
So yes, if you have a perfect jawline and six pack abs, then, by all means, advertise that!
But what matters more than those set-in-stone features is your LOOK.
Style, fashion and fitness go a long way.
My advice in general is pick a style or fashion that doesn’t require you to be super good looking and own it.
For example, you can have the bad-ass look, or the successful guy look, or the artistic guy look. It doesn’t matter which look you go for, as long as it resonates with you and shows that you ‘get it’ and have social value.
An average looking guy that “gets it” and dresses the part is no longer an average looking guy.
Add high value behavior on top of that and you’re now pretty much the epitome of a man that women want.
So to the extent that looks do matter, it’s more about the overall style and look that you’re conveying, rather than the specific physical aesthetics.
And of course, even if you’re not quite Brad Pitt, sometimes the best solution to the slight disadvantage of being not Brad Pitt is approach more.
In fact I constantly have good looking guys on program that simply put don’t approach and get left in the dust by average looking guys that do.
See video below for why this is the case.
TO PUT THIS DISCUSSION TO BED…
So, to put this discussion to bed, how do you get hot girls if you’re an average looking guy?
The answer is exactly the same way as if you were a good looking guy.
Again, when it comes to approaching hot girls, the difference between a super good looking guy and an average looking guy is just 30 seconds.
When you walk up as an average looking guy, you’re going to be judged a little more quickly so it’s important to make a good impression with your words and non-verbal communication to keep yourself in the door.
If you’re a good looking guy, you might get 30 seconds more. After that 30 seconds, you’re going to be judged just the same as if you were an average looking guy.
Remember this: an average looking guy with good game beats a good looking guy with no game, hands down, every time!
AND
If an average looking guy can get his look and style together, he has just as much of an advantage as the good-looking guy. It’s as simple as that.
-Todd
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