A Field Report With A Lesson.
I had an 8-hour layover in Beijing, China a short while ago…
As I was going through security, a girl with a particularly nice figure caught my attention. My eyelids were feeling heavy from the jetlag, but I still decided to have a little fun.
She was briefly stopped by security, so as I walked past I opened with an observational statement:
“I thought you were getting in trouble for a second there.” With a cheeky grin on my face.
She smiled back and responded well.
I continued the interaction when we were both standing in front of the flight info screens…
After some brief small talk we established that we both had a good few hours to kill. So I invited her for an instant date by saying:
“I was planning to find somewhere to get some food, you’re welcome to join me if you like” – To which she complied.
This is the next step to creating a solid interaction: Compliance.
I found a nearby bar, where we ordered some drinks and basic snack food as I continued the conversation…
The general conversation was “get to know you” topics. With Playful Teases, Cold Reads and We Frames added to establish a Man-to-Woman Premise.
I did this while building sexual tension with eye contact and strong tonality. AKA The Fundamentals
We sat for about an hour…
Once we’d finished our food and drinks I suggested we should take a walk around the airport to explore a little.
I did this as a way to build further compliance, and create more of a dynamic that we are together…
Sharing multiple experiences together.
We had spent enough time at the first location. The time had come to move it forward.
After exploring the airport for a while, we found our gates. On the way we walked past a section which had small rooms you could rent to take some rest while waiting for your flights…
A little bit like small hotel rooms.
Ding ding ding!
This was the lightbulb moment where I suddenly realised sex could actually be on the cards.
As we walked past I pointed them out by saying, “Oh look, that’s actually pretty cool.”
I did this so she would be aware of them for the possibility of future reference. AKA Seeding the pull.
We sat down by her gate and kept talking. With still a few hours before our flights this is where it started to get interesting…
I knew she liked me at least a little based on her investment and engagement. We had flirted enough already. There was only so many ways it could go….
We were going to opposite sides of the world and would likely never see each other again. So why not go all in?
It’s like you’re running towards the goal with the ball in your possession. It’s a risky shot to take, but you need one point to win and there’s 10 seconds left on the clock…
If you don’t take the shot you fail by default. So what do you do?
You take the fucking shot.
Escalation is always a risk, but if you are going to fail it’s better to fail forward.
We’d spent about two hours together.
Before this I’d been a little physical, but nothing too risky…
I’d made some light touches on her shoulder and upper arms during conversation but not much else.
I started to slow down my speech and looked her in the eyes with a slight grin while saying:
“Damn, we still have so much time… I wonder what we should do.”
She agreed, “You’re right, what should we do?”.
I put my hand out, she takes it, I gently pull her in and kiss her.
This surprised her a little. She calls me crazy. But the way I handled it is important:
I act as if it’s nothing, no big deal, I’m not emotionally reactive. I DO NOT qualify.
This is completely normal. Once she began to calm down and be okay about the kiss I begun the next steps in making the pull go down.
I treated it differently from a more traditional pull. I knew it would be quite hard to seed reasons to go to a mini pay-by-the-hour hotel room other then to have sex.
My goal was to help her imagine the IDEA of us having sex together. I would then bring up the hotel room to help her actually consider it in reality. Then try to handle any of her objections.
This plan definitely risky…
I started by making some statements like:
“Oh man we’ve still got so much time to kill, this is gonna get pretty boring.”
“I wonder what we could do together to make this more fun.”
“I mean, I can think of something that would be fun for the both of us”.
After a while she understood exactly what I was referring to.
She gave the objection that we didn’t have anywhere to go. Which is when I suggested the mini hotel I had pointed out earlier.
After this I kept framing it in a positive way “I mean it would be pretty fun, we have nothing else to do”.
Her final objection was when she asked if we would have enough time…
I handled this by breaking down how much time she had until her flight and how far away the rooms were.
After this she didn’t have any other objections and I knew I was good to go.
All her objections were to do with the process of the event, not the event itself.
This is critical to be aware of when you’re going for the pull:
The issue wasn’t that she didn’t want to have sex with me.
It was how we would go about it.
This is essentially the difference between legitimate objections VS conditions.
After this she didn’t have any other objections, so I stood up and said “well… let’s go.”
After this it all went smooth. We walked together to the mini hotel, checked in and went to the room without any problems.
I won’t go into great detail about what happened in the room…
But afterwards she was extremely grateful.
I had completely blown her reality of what she was expecting to happen at that airport.
She was just a girl travelling on her own with zero expectations…
Then she meets a cool guy who helps her have an incredible sexual experience…
Without any feelings of shame or judgement.
This is the power of having good game, and moving an interaction forward.
Now as much as this was a fun experience for myself, there’s an important lesson you can take away.
I had no idea this interaction would end with sex…
But the reason it did was because I MOVED THE INTERACTION FORWARD.
So often guys will leave an interaction when it’s completely unnecessary.
It’s one of the biggest problems we see with guys on Immersions and Bootcamps.
We call this Premature Ejectulation.
They eject early.
They leave with the number or the instagram… But what they should have done instead was MOVE THE INTERACTION FORWARD.
I want to remove as much confusion around this idea as possible. So that next time you’ll have a better idea of what to do.
So what does Moving The Interaction Forwards actually mean?
In any given interaction, there is generally a chain of events that will happen between Open and Sex.
A process if you will.
It’s RARE that you will open a girl, talk to her in the exact same place you met, and then leave directly to have sex.
So with this in mind, any time you are talking to a girl, you want to be thinking:
“What is the next action we can take that will move this interaction closer to sex.”
In Daygame this can be stopping her on the street, taking her on an instant date, taking her to a second venue or going for a walk around the area.
In Nightgame it can be meeting her friends, isolating her, taking her to the bar, taking her outside, taking her to the dancefloor.
If you spend too much time in one place, it’s easy for the interaction to get stagnant.
Now moving it forward can often be risky, but if you want to succeed in game you need to get comfortable taking risks.
Failure by taking the right steps forward is ALWAYS better then failure by inaction.
That’s essentially what happens when you don’t move it forwards.
You’ll fail anyway.
By moving the interaction forward you’re:
1. Building COMPLIANCE
Which is crucial to having a solid interaction.
When you’ve built compliance and established yourself as a leader, the pull will be SO MUCH EASIER.
There comes a point in the interaction where “making her like you more” will not get you any closer to sex.
The game now becomes one of strategy and problem solving.
HOW can I make this happen?
Connecting the dots that will lead the interaction to sex.
And taking the necessary steps forward.
So next time you are out talking with a girl…
Instead of thinking, “What can I do to make her like me more?”
Think to yourself, “What can I do to move this interaction forwards?”
And then fucking commit.