What does “High Value” Mean Anyway?
“You have to be a high-value man to get high-caliber girls.”
If you’ve been following pickup for any amount of time, you should know that value is what makes all of this work.
But what even IS value?
How do you GET it?
Who even decides what “High Value” even is?
This article (and the video below), should clear some things up.
What Is Value?
The reason you’re sitting here right now is because all of your ancestors decided to copulate with one another…and well, here you are.
But WHY did all this sex happen in the first place? Why do women have sex anyway?
From an evolutionary standpoint, value is anything that would help a female survive and get her genes into the next generations.
For men, a lot of the value they seek in women has a lot to do with health, youth, and yes, personality and temperament.
But women are different. Very different.
Even though we don’t live in tribes anymore, some of the traits women look for today are similar to what they wanted back then.
- Looks and Attractiveness: How you look is an indicator of your health. And women, in general, prefer healthy good looking guys over sick ones (looks DO matter).
- Resources and Money: The more resources you control, the higher the chances of survival and prosperity of any woman that mates with you. Not to mention your offspring.
- Social Alliances: If you have people that owe you favors, that look out after you, or that work for you, it increases the chances of her and your offspring’s survival and prosperity.
- Social Skills: Being able to give good social experiences to people is a cue that indicates social status. Even if it doesn’t directly increase the chances of survival of a woman, it indicates that you’ve been in social situations where you’ve taken risks and it has worked.
Here’s where it gets tricky…
Money and Looks Are Not The Only Things Girls Care About
I’ve met hundreds of successful and attractive guys, with lots of money and lots of resources, that were NOT successful with women. (I get these kinds of guys on my programs ALL the time).
So what’s my point?
It doesn’t matter what value you think you have. It matters what value you convey to the girl.
Just having one thing (wealth or looks) will not help you all that much. You can be a wealthy good looking guy, but if you’re lame and boring, girls will not be attracted to you for very long. Or at all.
Because I know this is a contentious point, don’t get me wrong.
Money and looks do help somewhat, but they’re not the only factors girls evaluate you on when deciding your value.
Again, girls assess your value by evaluating a combination of factors, not just one factor.
It’s Not About the Value You Have, It’s About the Value you CONVEY
Let’s get practical.
You’re a man between 15-60, and you’ve had lots of life experiences that have made you who you are today.
And that right there, is your value. It’s WHO you are.
Your experiences, your values, your perspective of life, your passions, your personality…all that goes into your value.
But again, women can’t just SEE that. They don’t actually know any of that stuff when you just walk up and say hi.
So they mostly try and GUESS at your value as you display it, second by second.
Here’s the reality though…
Women can only judge what you show them. From the first couple seconds, she’s judging every little thing that you do.
A lot of the external signs of value are easy to fix (yes, brush your teeth and get some style). I don’t talk about this stuff because frankly, it’s obvious.
But it’s the words and how you say those words that most directly affect her opinions of you.
Which is where game comes in.
If you ask nothing but boring questions like:
- What do you do for a living?
- Where are you from?
- How old are you?
Girls lose interest very quickly. They start sensing that something is off.
They start thinking that “Hey, this guy clearly doesn’t get it” and place you in the garbage bin of guys that have approached her before with nothing to offer.
You become, in her mind, low value.
It’s kinda like saying: “Hey, I’ve got nothing to offer, so I have to ask a bunch of lame questions to keep the conversation going.”
Meanwhile, if you carry yourself with confidence, and showcase clear high value behaviors (and yes, know how to flirt), she starts getting aroused and attracted.
Once you hit on all the subconscious social cues of high value as mentioned before…then congrats…you become high value in her eyes.
But there is one caveat…
One Last Thing About Value
Value is not absolute. Value is relative.
Which do you value more: a brick of gold or a glass of water? You’re probably thinking gold.
But if you’re dehydrated in a desert and haven’t tasted water in days, you’d clearly pick the water.
The same is true for girls.
What’s valuable to a girl will change based on where she is in her life, on the things she’s been taught, and by her values.
What’s valuable to one girl might not be valuable to another girl.
A major part of advanced game is CALIBRATION. Ie. Knowing what the girl needs in the moment.
And a major part of calibration is understanding her blueprint.
I’ll end with this just to really drill it in:
It’s not about how much value you have, it’s about how much and what kind of value you convey.
And that depends completely on both who you are, who you show yourself to be, and what the girl wants you to be.
Take James Bond. To some women he can be the ultimate man. But to others he can be a total blowhard.
So don’t just be James Bond. Be HER James Bond.
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